Scumbag’s Theory of Life (Part 1)

A friend of mine, Ducirous wanted to write an article. Looking at how he was so eager in writing stuff and posting it online I decided to host his article here to encourage his English writing skills. This are his words and not mine so go and find him for any legality issues. (…what have I gotten myself into this time??!!)

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Today what i am about to tell is a story about a friend mine and his theory with it. His life and theory is so meaningless till i still can’t forget everything. Thus making me vomit everytime thinking his theory feeling that is he really a man or a scumbag perhaps. I will try to remake the whole conversation as clear and near as possible to give you a clear view about his life situation. I will name him as SCUMBAG to preserve his identity because of his theory will make tons of people hunting him down later. So last week there is this conversation about a man having tons of affair is appropriate. Apparently this conversation happen when i am not around. This conversation done by this 3 friend of mine and yes i know SCUMBAG.

Man of Honor: So SCUMBAG, today you got any new theory that you wanna share with us today?

Bastardman: Ya lor, long time never heard your theory liao.

SCUMBAG: Okay la since you both become my fan liao, so what can do. Okay la. I ask both of you la.
If man have affair outside the house is right or wrong?

Man of Honor: Of course wrong la, i am true man of honor sure won’t go cheating la.

Bastardman: Nothing to say……..(haizz here come again the nutty theory of his)

SCUMBAG: Honor my foot, do you know this is the man’s right of having affair. You see this logic here. Man can have many babies with so many women thus helping yourself to increase your bloodlines. To increase a man’s bloodlines has been the law of nature all this time. While woman can’t do that because there is no logic that a woman having tons of baby but not their bloodlines because it belong to another men bloodlines. You know during the past of China, the emperor have thousands of ‘gundik’ (mistress) therefore isn’t it the right for a man to have tons of affair. But i not so bias, if my future wife mau want affair go ahead lo as long my wife don’t play till go home enough. So as long it does not touch our sacred home, both of us can go out have affair with another person. So the moral of the story is man have their right to have affair even they are married, their wife can’t stop them from having affair at all.

Man of Honor: Hmmmm… interesting theory, so you consider that having affair is so virtuous and righteous.

Bastardman: ……….(speechless, think of how can he even be a friend with him)

SCUMBAG: Of course or else what you thought. I have decided that if by the age of 25 if i still can’t get a girlfriend, i will go find a prostitute thus claiming the title of being a man. Then after marry while get a mistress as well. Muahahahahahaha…..!!!!!!!

And thus the story of this chapter of life end here. This is just a mere Chapter 1 of his life so be rest assure that tons of his SCUMBAG theory will come to surface again. If you do not believe me, it’s fine as i know this SCUMBAG is a really alive somewhere in malaysia. So beware of this SCUMBAG. And i strongly say that this SCUMBAG is not Clow. But then again anything can happen in this world.

by Ducirous.

Clow – No, Scumbag is not me but unfortunately….I know the guy too…sigh…

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