Sadness of life by Ducirous

Each person in their life will always encounter failure whether it is in career, relationships, family, and many others just to name a few. Yet we still keep on moving forward towards our unknown destinations. I too was once a naive 17 years old kid thinking that having a girlfriend is cool and a part of everyday life and it was a norm to have a girlfriend. And thus i went and try to ‘kao’ (court) a girl and then confess to her. Yup it is still a bit embarrassing for me personally cause what I did was that I went and confess when there is people around and it was the most idiotic and crazy moment in my life for first time(embarrassing too!).

After the obvious rejection, the sadness would definitely appear but when I think about it, back then, at least I did what I honestly wanted to do. Starting on that day, she started to avoid me (yes Clow you know who is she and I don’t mind she reading this also because there’s nothing wrong ma!), anyway what can one expect after that embarrassing moment. That period, I felt like digging a hole and just hide my face head in there.

Anyway it has pass for 6 years since that traumatic incident, i dun feel much at all just funny and a bit of idiotic only. Yet a bit of regret of not talking to her normally like before. But then life must go on. And thus when i was 19 years old, i went working first time at a company despite my past sales promoter job. That time it was a data entry job but I encountered another petite cute girl after 3 month of working there. She joined the company 3 month later. So anyways, at that time i haven’t really did anything such as talking or asking her out since we were in different departments and during that time i was in work mode.

After another 2 more months, there was another girl who joined the company and was in the same department as her and thanks to her i start talking a bit to the girl. I must say at that time i wasn’t attract to her at all. I only think of us as colleagues only and nothing more than that. Anyway we weren’t that close  just like i say hi and she will reply hi when we see each other. It was until after at least a year of working together that I started to notice that i personally am fond of her. Thus would i try to flirt with her even though I was an amateur, I was not daring enough to do anything more than just words. So as we go on becoming friends, we SMS’ed each other sometimes at night to say good night to each other and stuff. And after she have left the company, i continue to keep in contact with her. Then one day after building enough courage i confessed to her to know how does she feel about me, but apparently she does feel anything for me other than just a normal friendship. Therefore it was another failure and sadness in my life.

Though this time is different than the previous one, as this does not hurt as before because i haven’t given up yet. So i continue my friendship with her until to this present day. I have know a lot of her detail life and stuff happening in her life. During that period i have always think of the hope of touching her heart until recently. There was no fight or sort with her just some minor conversation by chatting. Thus i try to ask some of the indirect question to know my possibility of touching her heart but from what i have from her is still stating the fact, i will not have any chances. So recently, i have decide to give up in order to move on forward. This does not mean i will cease or contact with her as she can consider first good friend in opposite gender.

You all must be wondering why i am even writing all this. I wanna let all the people know that sometimes giving up is also a way to move on with your life, rather than continuing to desire to have that particular person. Plus this is also to let all the girls and guys know to give the other girl or guy a chance to touch your heart otherwise you will never truly know him or her. Plus as well if one have no interest in that person please let the person know in order to let him or her not to think to much. Apparently i am not embarrass to let other people to see my embarrassment as each of everyone have their most embarrassing moment in their life. And now i can self proclaimed myself a True Man. So man of honor are you even man enough to write this, i doubt so. I challenge you to write your own here if your a Man. If you do not accept this challenge, i will nick name you as Pussy.

PS- I feel writing this is more fun than writing an essay in the class last time. Hopefully Miss Yap don’t see this, as i know she will definite mark my English. Scary~~~

~Ducirous

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Hey, I know how you feel. The girl you mentioned earlier won’t care anymore. So don’t worry. You’re brave to go that far already so do not worry cause your friends will not look down on you. Giving up is a hard thing to do and carrying on like nothing ever happens is impossible to do. But speaking on the note of giving chances, it never ever happens unless you’re good looking, tall, great built and if you don’t have these then having lots of money helps. Its normal human nature to go for great packaging even though whats inside is total crap. They just like the nice beautiful, aesthetically pleasing look of the package that will make them buy it and in the end they regret it cause it gave them diarrhea or even worst cancer. Its hard to let people see whats really inside that makes a good product other than just packaging.

I might not been too clear cut on what I am saying but I believe those of you who are reading this will understand what it means. Just because people are not as what you imagine them to be physically (I want a girl with a perfect body, high IQ, etc too) but denying them a chance to prove themselves would only show how short sighted you are and who knows? Maybe that person might actually BE the right one for you. Besides, nobody is perfect and that perfect guy you like might be your worst nightmare. Think about it.

Heartbreak Hotel(Updated)

Heartbreaks are one of the worst things that can happen to a person other than death, debt and an incompetent government. Obviously, this condition is obtained by getting rejected by the person you confessed to, breaking up with your partner of many years, and also to no small part of unrequited love just to name a few. Sometimes, things work out but on the other side of the spectrum it works. In some instances this condition can be avoided with swift action implemented intelligently in the case of a troubled relationship. However, there’s nothing can be done if the person you confess to just do not gives you an opportunity due to who you are or circumstances.

There is no cure for heartbreaks and it is a scar that will leave deep marks on your life, heart and emotions. Only time can heal it but it is never truly healed 100%. Trust me I know. For those of you who have never been heartbroken before I hope you kill yourself or die a painful death choking on tofu these are some after affects:

Cannot sleep
Lack of appetite
Elmo Emo
Excessive crying
Lack of concentration
Reluctance to do anything
Failing one or more exams(due to concentration)
Wanting to be alone
Soulless
Depression
Attempting to do stupid things
Suicidal (get help!)

Almost everyone will encounter heartbreaks although it happens more often to men and it should be taken as a part of growing up and being human. There’s nothing that you can do to about it but to take it, accept it and live with it. As they say, if you don’t succeed try try again….until you die that is.

*Update:

It seems that my post “Heartbreak Hotel” really had a number of of my friends asking me on whether I just broke up with someone or did I get rejected or if I am now in a state of ‘Emo’. So let me make this clear, the article has nothing to do with me. The only thing that is related is the personal experience I had about that particular topic and also through my observations together with experiences of people I know. Besides, I’m still chasing after the silhouette of someone. Heh.

Projects, assignments and teamwork

Finally after quite a hiatus due to work and by work I mean assignments, projects and classes I’m back. But now since classes are over and everything else is almost done there’s finally time for me to scribble something in this ol’blog of mine.

In university, teamwork is a very important aspect in achieving ones goal or objective. Task such as group work or group based assignments are one of the fundamental teachings of university life. That is to say it was their intention but now for a lot of students its more of a curse than a blessing. In a team based assignment or project everyone is given a specific task to do and with it there will be less work and more time to do other stuff. It makes plenty of sense and in the real world teamwork is the basis of any organization. But what if some of you teammates are practically useless? Then all I can say is that you’re pretty much fucked.

You’re much so when your teamates has no initiative at all and always uses excuses upon excuses to delay the job making your life and other miserable in the end. And when you can’t wait any longer you do the work yourself and he/she begs you to put their name on the report as well.

I think many of us has experience this kinds of incidences one way or another and although its easy to say that we can just cancel the lazy names out but sometimes it does not work that way. Why? Cause the lecturer will say that its a ‘project’ and if your group member or partner isn’t doing much it only means that you have bad management and leadership skills and you won’t get a good mark for a lack of teamwork.

I hate that when it happens…don’t you?

Hmm…..

This is a picture of 2 girls in a car full of cocks. Be warned that this is not for the faint hearted and yes…I’m nuts.

Viva la Vida by Coldplay

This song is repeating in my head!